Monday, October 23, 2017

Sign Up With Me! The First Month's Free!

Get ready to be amazed. You will sure be phased. Phased by a whole lot. You'll want to pay for this plot. And pay and pay and pay. Oh yeah, it's free here today.

Sign up for access.
You can't make a mess.
Get all the great movies here.
"Great" isn't unclear.

We have Adam Sandler with us.
So great you won't fuss.
We have all the great ones.
Look, there are tons.

No, we don't have that.
Nope, that one falls flat.
Nah, those rights were taken.
Okay, maybe we are fakin.

Sign up for the best.
We beat all the rest.
We have everything you'll want.
Even subtitles with great big font.

Oh, we didn't get that one.
Nope, that one was too fun.
Nah, we couldn't buy the rights.
But forget keeping on the lights.

Sign up for even more.
We have so much in store.
You'll never be bored.
Your credit card info will be safely stored.

You'll get shows by the ton.
We've got every single one.
Every single one we could buy.
Whoops, did we tell a white lie?

Sign up because we're new.
We have plenty to view.
I know you heard that before.
But it is true with our encore.

See? Plenty to see.
You can trust me.
Sharknado is on display.
That must truly make your day.

And the first month's free.
Cancel any time at your sea.
Shhh we all still have your credit card.
But canceling isn't very hard.

Don't you love signing up for free? And then they ding and ding and ding thee. To get what you want you have to sign up for ten. May as well pay for cable at your den. Then you got sign ups for this, that and the other thing too. What's a poor credit card to do? Pffft I'll stay entertained by the singing bass. He is much cheaper for my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, October 22, 2017

Is This Really A Post At My Coast?

Yep, I'm really asking you that. Did you just read the words of the cat? So is this a post? Maybe it's a weenie roast. I don't have one of those. The vet went snip snip and there she goes.

Are you working?
Nah, I'm jerking.
Did I just go gutter?
Did it make you stutter?

Are you painting?
Nah, I'm fainting.
Fainting with a brush in hand.
My, isn't fainting grand.

Are you walking?
Nah, I'm gawking.
Gawking at an idiot now.
Look at you. Wow!

Are you sleeping?
Nah, I'm house keeping.
Under the covers I go.
It is so productive you know.

Are you showering?
Nah, I'm cowering.
The toilet is so scary.
I think I saw something hairy.

Are you sitting?
Nah, I'm spitting.
See that little spittle?
It's magic and will make you brittle.

Are you writing?
Nope, I'm fighting.
Fighting with the keyboard.
Look! I just pulled the cord.

Are you eating?
Boy, this is getting fleeting.
Are you that dumb?
Head up your bum?

Are you alive?
I wish you'd take a dive.
Getting lost at sea.
Isn't that nice of me?

Aren't I so mean?
Aren't you watching a screen?
Aren't you the imaginative one?
Aren't you glad these soooo hard questions are done?

Why do people right in front of you ask such stupid questions at their zoo? Do they believe them not to be true? Look, he's on the toilet, I'll ask what is coming due. Pfffft whoever says there aren't stupid questions are stupid too. Plenty of stupid ones come due. Ask a hard one and its back to beats me. Low brain cell count can sure affect thee. Do you ask such obvious things to ones near your blog wings? I had to give it another pass as real life dumbies keep asking very stupid questions to my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, October 21, 2017

Abused Or Confused? Either Way I'm Amused!

The cat heard someone repeat this eleven times as they yapped the other day. Yep, I counted at my bay. Said it in a span of three minutes or so too. I guess they truly never knew.

What was that?
Chew the fat.
Talk and rant.
Whoops, a slant.

Here it comes.
Ho and hums.
Or hums and hos?
Only Santa knows.

Or maybe not.
Things got to pot.
Get ready for it.
It sure is a hit.

Anticipation rising?
The cat you're despising?
How do I know?
I don't at my show.

But what do I say?
Said it many a day.
Not eleven times in a row,
That would annoy a crow.

Ready to see?
It comes to be.
On a spree.
It's the beats me.

What was that?
You got beat like a dingbat?
Beat by words?
Beat by birds?

Beat by a kangaroo?
Did it have Blue's shoe?
Do you have lots of bruises?
Don't wear swimwear on cruises.

Was it a metaphorical beating?
That has to be fleeting.
Bruised on the brain.
That must be a pain.

Dumbed down by a fake beating.
My, that's weird trick or treating.
You must have not checked your candy.
I hope you have poison control's number handy.

Did you get that? Are you on to the cat? Confused as can be? That's normal at my sea. Will you get it though? Beats me at my show. It really beats me. Beats me flies free. Beats me each day. Beats me is all I can say. Beats me why. Beats me sure wants to fly. I must have lots of bruises now. Beats me sure can wow. Beats me if you'll give sass. Either way, I'll still remain a little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, October 20, 2017

Dream A Little Dream Down Stream!

The cat would never stand in your way. Dream away at your bay. I'll be far far far away for some. Especially the dreams of the dumb. What was that? Dreams aren't dumb where any is at?

I dream to float.
Float like a boat.
I jump in and sink.
Dream drove me to drink.

I dream to fly.
Fly upon high.
I jump from a tall tower.
Dream brought a human splatter shower.

I dream to eat.
Eat and defeat.
My stomach went boom.
Dream blew me like a mushroom.

I dream to look cool.
Plastic face does rule.
Now I can strike a mannequin pose.
Dream came out smelling like a rose.

I dream to beat a car.
Playing chicken after a night at the bar.
I won't flinch first.
Dream and car made me burst.

I dream to win the lottery.
Then I'll take up pottery.
I spent every last cent today.
Dream left me broke without pay.

I dream to own a lion.
I'm sure tryin.
I just became a snack.
Dream made me part of the pack

I dream to walk naked in snow.
The arctic is where I want to go.
Things did freeze and I did die.
Dream led to a human Popsicle for an Eskimo eye.

I dream to find a mate.
I'm going to order a Russian date.
I got nothing for my dough?
Dream ended up making nothing grow.

I dream to stay away.
Stay away from such a foray.
And look, that I can do.
My dream came true.

Still think all dreams are grand? Don't you want them all coming due across the land? I suppose that would weed out the dumb in the human race as they take up cemetery space. That is if anything is left behind but the splatter of mankind. What was that? Hey, I'm not a gruesome cat. Not my dream at my sea and no zombie feet came to be. Sorry, not really, that I broke such dreams like glass. I'm just that kind of dreaming little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, October 19, 2017

Advertise Here Ever So Clear!

The cat was out and about the other day when someone tried to get me to advertise at their bay. They said this, that and the other thing. Of course all a familiar ring.

We got the site.
It's just the best.
Your sales will take flight.
We're better than the rest.

So advertise here.
It's as simple as that.
I'm sure you will cheer,
With clicks like that.

And so it goes.
Most you can suspect.
They strike a merry pose,
Thinking you can't neglect.

Pffft and walk away.
But how can you?
Easy at ones bay.
They just haven't a clue.

But they were cheery.
Their stats are there.
Nothing about it eerie.
Unless written on their underwear.

I still strolled away.
And on they went.
They hit replay,
When they needed to get bent.

But we got the site.
You shouldn't refuse.
Sales will take flight.
You surely can't lose.

Nothing is greater.
Not around here.
We corner the crater.
You have nothing to fear.

In one ear, out the other.
Thought her jargon would work.
Treat her like my mother.
Shhhh I pretend to listen with an ear perk.

And so I looked.
Just for the hell of it.
Pffft to what was booked.
Was a complete load of shit.

To put it in perspective to all, their site had less traffic than a cat that rhymes each day on his wall. Yet they were so great. Pffft and a dog and the cat will mate. But oh, needed to advertise somewhere. Pfffft once more to that with pffft's to spare. Ever come across any of those? She should go bother crows. The cat will only leave her with gas. She wasn't going to get rich off my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, October 18, 2017

Stay Cheery And Fan The Theory!

Well you have the conspiracy nuts in their conspiracy ruts, but that we know. Been there, done that at our show. But what about the truly fake kind? Are those on your mind?

I'm a fan.
Part of a clan.
A clan with a theory.
The real was too dreary.

There was death.
They gave their last breath.
We really hate that.
Let's look deeper where we're at.

There are signs.
Can bee seen by even felines.
They are sure there.
We have a theory to spare.

It was all a dream.
A coma type stream.
They are really alive.
Yippeee, we now know they survive.

This one was just fake.
Death really didn't partake.
They faked it all.
They are off having a ball.

That one wasn't true.
It made me boo hoo.
We can't have that.
It wasn't a great final stat.

Instead a magic spell came due.
Yep, it was all voodoo.
That was why it went the other way.
Everything is true in what we say.

They were also cloned.
A doctor was phoned.
It was done in a secret lab.
They made the clone from a crab.

And don't forget the love.
The more we rant, the greater the shove.
They will really come due.
Even brothers get it on out of view.

Yep, that isn't dreary.
It is our theory.
We wish it to be.
So it is for those like you and me.

Any fan theories you find nuts? Some must really be smoking the "good stuff" as they stay in theory ruts. Even when creators say, no way, they keep up their theory at their bay. Some are sure interesting though. Any that you know? Some sure must have sucked on some bad gas. Hey, it didn't come from my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, October 17, 2017

Don't Cross The Line And All Will Be Fine!

The cat drew a line at the door. No one shall cross at my shore. If you don't know that you better beware. You may be in for more than an evil glare.


I was out and about.
I had to check this thing out.
I wanted to make sure I could fit.
That is when I heard it.


Cassie heard it too.
A scratching came due.
A scratching at our door. 
The others wanted to explore.


There were five at play.
They wanted to join the fray.
They wanted to play with our toys.
I don't share my joys.


And here one comes.
Damn those furry bums.
We aren't chums.
They can suck on plums.



Cassie stopped his dash.
 For a moment it put a kink in their bash.
But she doesn't care about the other ones.
So they don't get the runs.


Look at her just watching the show.
 So pathetic, I know.
How can she let them invade?
My toys I won't trade.


So he tried once more.
The jumper was also going to come ashore.
Screw any of that.
I stopped being a curious cat.


I hopped back into the room.
I gave them a look of doom.
I may have hissed and swatted too.
But that I won't tell you.


One simply ran away.
One jumped from his table display.
Another gave me a dirty look.
The old guy never budged at our nook.


So remember one and all.
You don't get into my hall.
 Even in the dark I've got both eyes upon you.
Don't cross the line at my zoo.

Wasn't that a good warning for all? Can you believe Cassie wanted to let them play with our toys like the furry ball? Pfffft the cat is not that nice. I will treat them like mice. They come near me and, wham, a face full of my toe jam. I'll have to get after Cass. She needs to be as mean as my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, October 16, 2017

Living It Up With A Slight Hiccup!

The cat finds this one a tad funny. Humans really aren't right on the money. Maybe that is why so many are in debt. Probably not, long odds on that bet. Time to get living away at every bay.

I've lived here.
I've lived there.
Some cause fear.
Some cause care.

I've traveled here.
I've traveled there.
I drank my beer,
Spent money to spare.

One's not the same.
One's different than the other.
They have a different name,
Maybe like your brother.

They are related.
More than you think.
This post was fated.
May cause you to blink.

We're on the living.
We're not on death.
No need for forgiving,
Or even holding your breath.

Why is that?
Still not caught up?
Follow like a cat,
And not a low attention span pup.

No matter where you are.
No matter where you roam.
In plane, train or car.
Whether or not you're at home.

You are above ground.
Not ash blowing in the breeze.
Hear that little sound?
Are you still in brain freeze?

I'll make you unstuck.
I'm getting there soon.
No need to say fluck,
Or go all High Noon.

For even if there.
Guess what you're doing?
You're living life to spare,
And death you are shooing.

Maybe you should change it to asking where one has made a home? That is different that wherever you roam. Because if you say living or lived to anyone out there, whoops, everything counts with nothing to spare. You have lived every single place you have ever been to. Until you drop dead, it will remain so for you. Does the cat think too much at our sea? Has the wording ever been thought of by thee? Maybe humans just don't want to write a long list about all that came to pass. I'll go on living with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, October 15, 2017

Good On Plate Ahead Of Great!

The cat never got this one even though he has said it a ton. I guess it just got said and stayed there after catching on? Maybe Zeus said it at dawn? Beats the heck out of me. But I can make fun of it at my sea.

Good morning everyone.
Even if it sucks a ton.
I say it is good.
Sucky morning may get misunderstood.

What if it is meh today?
Does good still come into play?
No need to answer that.
Good morning is still where it's at.

So the morning is good today.
You go on at your bay.
The afternoon stinks.
Good afternoon gets winks.

At it once more.
The good comes ashore.
Even when it has a stench.
Is that like a rusty wrench.

You can't budge the stripped screw.
It's evening at your zoo.
But it is still good.
Even if bad or dull as wood.

But go on the flip,
With the good trip.
Your day is great.
It was all top rate.

Now what do you say,
As you join the outside fray?
You say good every time.
Are you some kind of stuck mime?

Wonderful and great.
Those are a fine fate.
But you can't share.
So users beware.

Evening, morning or noon.
Sing the same old tune.
Everything is always good.
Wouldn't change if you could.

I think I've got it down.
No morning, afternoon or evening can frown
Also no cheer can come due.
It must remained whelmed for all of you.

So days were whelmed long before the cat let whelmed come to be? That is a new one for me. Do you use anything besides good? Ever heard it said "Great Morning" at your hood? Wouldn't great beat good any day? Who wants to be good when crappy comes your way? The cat has you thinking now with this pass. Good, whatever time of day it is, from my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, October 14, 2017

Play Along To Get Strong!

There was a saying we heard for the thousandth time the other day. Actually it was more, but we are too lazy to count, okay? Does that make us stronger for it? I guess we'll decide in a bit.

It won't kill.
That's a thrill.
You'll live through.
Wow, look at you.

Stronger for it.
Whether a lot of a bit.
You are now stronger.
You'll live so much longer.

Step on a land mine.
Bah, a lost leg is fine.
You are alive and stronger for it.
One legged is no cause for a fit.

You caught some bad disease.
You blow over in the breeze.
But it didn't kill you.
So strong at your zoo.

You're broke and can't eat.
Bugs are your best treat.
Frail and starving away.
But not dead, so all is okay.

Not just okay.
Nope, that's not the way.
Okay and stronger too.
Wow, doesn't that impress you?

You don't know how to write.
You can't even read at your site.
But you are stronger because of it.
For it doesn't kill you one bit.

You just went blind.
Life is so unkind.
But you are still here.
Stronger even if you can't see clear.

You had a heart attack.
Bah, give it no flack.
You're still alive.
Stronger when you survive.

You got screwed 5 times over.
You were even bit by a rabid rover.
But you are here among us still.
So strong even if you turn ill.

The cat finds you humans soooo strong. Pffft yeah if I was dumb and played along. Such stupid sayings you come up with each day. Sometimes it is true, but other times, no way. Ever use that one at your sea? I've had it said to me. Pffft is all I said. Some people are a bit touched in the head. Now go stub your toe so you gain muscle mass. It's a fact and won't kill you says my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, October 13, 2017

Permit To Seek To Climb A Peak!

The cat finds you humans really strange. I don't think that is ever going to change. The overgrown humans are the worse. They are truly perverse. Not even in a gutter way. From there we will stray today.

I have a dream.
I want it to come true.
But I need a team.
Let's jump up and down, on cue.

You can get your dream.
Listen to me.
You can even have that ice cream.
I give permission to thee.

Now you can go.
Look at you.
You went to some stupid show,
And believed the so called guru.

I've seen a wiser four year old.
Whoops, did I say that.
Don't let it affect what you're told.
At least in diapers you don't scat.

I want to be on a diet.
But what can I eat?
I really want to try it,
But what should I delete?

You should delete nothing at all.
Just buy my great book.
There the writing is on the wall.
You'll shed pounds and get your true look.

Read and take it to heart.
Yeah, dumb enough too.
Did I cause a stop and start?
I'm really no help to you.

Can I tweak the workout for me?
I think it works better this way.
But I won't do it unless permitted by thee.
I really wouldn't want to stray.

Can you tell me so?
I'm waiting on you.
I mean, what do I know?
I'm not a great guru.

It's okay to do what works?
Thanks for letting me know.
Getting permission has so many perks.
I can truly let common sense go.

Pfffffffffft humans like that need a kick to the head. Maybe a cat to pee on them in bed. Acting like four year olds needing permission is soooo dumb. Humans need to wake up and then some. I'm not talking permission from spouse or work or anything like that. But for diet, workout, following a dream and such scat. Pfffffft if you need permission to follow a dream that you have for you from some windbag so called guru the cat will sell you a huge cashew jar filled with magical poo. With it you can get anything you want to come to pass. You can so trust in my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, October 12, 2017

A Little Change On The History Range!

Wow, humans sure like to twist the facts. Look at all those past acts. They were always oh so great. Pffft and so is a 1000% interest rate.

What happened is true.
Hear what I tell you.
The past can't be changed.
Can't ever be rearranged.

Cars were invented in Timbuktu.
Believe what I tell you.
Say it 50 times with me.
Be as gullible as can be.

America never lost or started a war.
That is just a chore.
Believe what I say.
It will be true by the end of the day.

Canada has gold in ever town.
Each walks with a golden crown.
It is invisible though.
Hard to see, but you must know.

GMO is great for you.
That is entirely true.
It saves the Earth.
Now you can have unlimited birth.

Aliens caused world war 2.
Hitler was one in view.
Believe it every single bit.
Be a true blue twit.

The Earth is really flat.
Don't be a round dingbat.
Believe this to be true.
Whoops, some already do.

The old west was grand.
It was such a clean land.
Believe what you see on TV.
All white teeth came to be.

Superman was invented in China.
Supergirl was in Regina.
They were drawn in Australia though.
Now you are truly in the know.

Ra ra ra.
La de da.
Change and rearrange with glee.
We make it what we want it to be.

The truth is fiction with many a human depiction. Always wanting their side to be the right and trying to hide the bad in the dark of night. Fall for any of the fake crap? Humans are even manipulating in schools with their fake strat. I guess they want to keep up with the lying internet mass. Pffft such "truths" can kiss my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, October 11, 2017

A Little Spin With Caged In!

Humans laugh at us in a cage as we look at them full of rage. I may even pee in the cage too. Sometimes I do number two. Yeah, I hate that thing. But I usually save it for the vet and let it fling. Okay, enough of that because you're caged where you're at.

I'm so free.
Look at me.
Not caged one bit,
As here I sit.

I'm inside a home.
But I can still roam.
I have to pay bills,
Or I'll live in the hills.

But that's not caged.
Wait, I've been paged.
Do they even do that anymore?
We'll go with text at your shore.

There at your hall,
You're connected to all.
Slave to the phone.
Was that a new message tone?

Whoops, in the car.
Door not a jar.
Isn't that a big cage?
One that costs many a wage.

But you're still free.
No cage around thee.
You are limitless as can be.
Damn, you keep lying to me.

Can't vacation all year.
From miles away can't hear.
Can't jump to the moon.
Some can't use a spoon.

Some can't run a mile.
Some can't floor tile.
Some can't handle the cold.
Some hate when the heat takes hold.

Some cage from within.
Thinking about sin.
Oh woe as me.
But I'm still free.

Limited and caged.
Both have been paged.
Both apply to you.
Whoops, away freedom flew.

We all have limits and are caged in some way. Ever think about that at your bay? I guess a ride in a cage isn't so bad as at least the cat has no bills to be had. I hope none of you go in your cage though. That would be a nasty show. Enjoy the cage of mowing grass. I'll stay a mostly free feline little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, October 10, 2017

It's All Greek Up Shit Creek!

Humans like to go for the I can't. Or maybe the I don't know slant. They do it before they even try and then away they tend to fly. Can be anything in which it is the case as away from it they race.

Up that creek,
All is Greek.
Your boat may leak.
Can't even speak.

You don't know how.
That creek can't wow.
Until it is able.
Nope, not a fable.

You give it a try.
Failure does fly.
Or maybe you go out and succeed.
Either way, you're learning the deed.

You fail and quit.
Whoops, more shit.
Look at you forever sinking.
FYI, that water isn't safe for drinking.

Wait a moment there.
You pulled out your hair.
Which may hurt a bit,
But again you tried it.

Hmm, learned a bit more.
You give it another encore.
You try and try again.
What's happening at your den?

Your boat isn't sinking.
The nasty water you aren't drinking.
You actually see shore.
Look at you trying some more.

Uh oh, you are learning.
To shore you are returning.
Your boat is looking good.
You even have paddles in your hood.

You are failing less.
It isn't such a mess.
Things are becoming clear.
The shore is so near.

You step out of the boat.
You even have a rain coat.
You now can get through it all.
Wowee, you just learned at your hall.

No matter what it is from writing to the cooking biz, the more you try and try, the more you will learn and not fry. You can get out of shit creek. You can make your boat not leak. Willingness goes a long way. At least with most things at play. You have to not be a brain dead fool and for somethings, like a surgeon, you really need school. But a lot you can get out of by trying and learning as you go. Are you one that runs away or goes, Oh No? You'll never learn anything skidding across the glass. I prefer to break it with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, October 9, 2017

100% Science Is The Way At Each and Every Bay!

So the cat was told the other day that science is 100% accurate at his bay. Hmmmmm, I refused to argue with this idiot though. My IQ would suffer a blow if so. But works for a post here at my coast.

Science has 100% truth,
At each and every booth.
It can't be wrong,
From here to Hong Kong.

The data is right.
Numbers take flight.
They don't lie,
They are from upon high.

Nothing will be proven wrong.
So just agree and go along.
Scientists are so great.
They have such a great trait.

Wait? What was that?
You are just a silly cat.
They are all right.
Day and even night.

They don't lie one bit.
No, they aren't full of shit.
They don't play the game.
That would just be lame.

Who needs grant money?
You are so funny.
Who needs to appease the board?
Go and pull the rip cord.

That just can't be.
Science won't lie to me.
Scientists get it right.
They show all the light.

It's the end all and be all.
Read the scribbles on the wall.
Hear their data call.
Now agree and stand tall.

They have no need to appease.
Who cares about trustees.
Big companies and such?
Bah, they don't reach out and touch.

Science is 100% true.
You have a loose screw.
Listen to what they found.
It has a 100% truth sound.

Pfffft once more from the cat. Just another friggin dingbat. If humans are behind it, then yep, it can be complete bullshit. They want to appease and keep the money flowing. So of course no one is going to have a contrary showing. Data can be manipulated up the ying yang with ease. Some people suffer from Stupid Disease. I think their head is full of gas. Much more than what comes out my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, October 8, 2017

A Normally Slant With This Chant!

Today is different though. No post will show. Whoops, I think I failed at that. Normally I'm a truthful cat. Actually that may not be true. Damn, all over the place at my zoo.

Normally you're here.
Normally you're there.
Normally you'd peer.
Normally you'd stare.

Normally there would be a post.
Normally I may try and fool.
Normally I hate toast.
Normally fills a pool.

For normally you're this.
Normally you're that.
But if it doesn't bring you bliss,
You don't give a scat.

But can't say that.
That's not normal you.
Whatever the normal stat,
If normal is even true.

Been there, done that.
So do not dwell.
Don't want to cause a spat,
"Normal" people may raise hell.

Instead let's avoid it.
Normally I would not.
But here as I sit,
I went against my plot.

Or maybe I'm lying.
For normally you'd see crass.
I swear I'm trying,
Normally I have more sass.

Or maybe I'm not.
A lot of confusion.
Normally that's my plot,
And it's an amusing delusion.

Normally you'd stare.
Normally you'd leave confused.
Normally you're well aware,
That I'm normally amused.

Today isn't that.
Unlike normally you fully got it.
You followed the cat.
Normally you'd get only a bit.

Do you have questions? Normally I take suggestions. But today isn't normally as is with my rhyming biz. Or is it? This normally is confusing a bit. Normally it means you just want to run away and so normally normally is what you say. Have you caught on to this rhyming pass? Don't worry, that's normally the way with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, October 7, 2017

A Speedy Post To The Coast!

Wow, talk about nothing to say and I thought the weather was bad at my bay. I guess anything can spur a discussion though. Hey, I prove that with rhyming away at my show.

Look at that.
Chew the fat.
The fat about it.
Every single bit.

Leave nothing out.
Can scream and shout.
It must be said.
Get it out of your head.

Sometimes that's best.
Passes the test.
Other times not.
May prove you have brain rot.

What's that about?
Things must come out.
Say what's on your mind.
One strange thing, mankind.

How can it be on?
Even if it does dawn.
On your might is like,
A light bulb strike.

But that's not here nor there.
For that's not in our hair.
What's in our hair today,
Is speed signs on display.

Let's dissect them all.
It will be a ball.
We need to learn the why.
Let's do, not try.

100 allowed there.
With lots of space to spare.
100 allowed here,
With 80 drawing near.

Now why is that?
Why does it fall flat?
Tell me, I must know.
It is life altering like a deadly foe.

Then it drops to 60 over here.
Then back up to a 100 ever so clear.
What's the point in that?
Whoops, all the time we have from the cat.

Ugg, talk about mind numbing at ones bay. Who gives a crap why they are on display? They are at their sea. No need to dissect ever curve and crap that comes to be. I had to listen to that for an hour or more. I think I'm speed signed out at my shore. Do you dissect speed signs on display? Think I had enough for one life time at my bay. So I'll speed away unless through a school zone with a kiddie class. Then I'll slow down my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, October 6, 2017

A Little Tweak To The Week!

The cat already did the day but it seems like the week is also at play. Humans sure are rather sad. Minutes will probably next be had. They may start with hours first. Seconds may be the worst.

It's a new week.
A new week for a peak.
Come and join.
Won't cost you much coin.

It's safety week.
Don't want to be up shit creek.
Stay safe just this week.
The other 51 you can leak.

It's the week of whelmed.
Nothing exhausting can be helmed.
Nothing over, nothing under.
No one shall steal any thunder.

It's the week of no dumb sayings.
Humans give those many replayings.
Can't say all will be fine,
Or any other useless platitudes that align.

It's the week of walking.
That may put a kink in stalking.
No driving cars allowed.
Walk with the crowd.

It's the week of hopping.
Everyday you must start popping.
Up and down you must go,
At least for an hour or so.

It's the week of no news.
Turn it off and pull the fuse.
Don't listen to a single windbag.
I'm sure that wouldn't be a drag.

It's the week of common sense.
No one is allowed to be dense.
That may be the hardest of all.
Especially for those who's brain is on permanent stall.

It's the week of no treats.
Nope, can't have those so called good eats.
Diabetes may get mad.
God forbid it becomes a fad.

It's the week of the cat.
Cats rule where they are at.
Whoops, that is forever.
Forget this endeavor.

Any weeks you have seen out there? Maybe one you want at your lair? How do these things even start anyway? Does some nut just pull it out of a hat one day? I guess whelmed week is week 39. Pfffft says the feline. I'll stick with variety of each daily pass from my ever so little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, October 5, 2017

A Marrying Way Here Today!

The other day the cat was out and he heard a shout. One guy was making fun as his divorce, I guess, was done. He married the devil at his sea. Damn, how did that come to be?

Married the dark guy.
The one that makes flames fly.
Maybe he was horny?
That could get a bit thorny.

The devil must be nice.
Wonder what was his price?
Was it a soul deal?
Maybe he ate it as a meal.

Never knew the devil got divorced.
I wonder if that can be enforced?
Do our laws apply in Hell?
Down there can they even spell?

Maybe it is too hot.
Pens melt on the spot.
Then that would mean he's stuck.
Unless Hell froze over and passed the buck.

Could make his relationship cold.
Things wouldn't get very bold.
That could be the reason why.
A shame for the poor limp guy.

But wait, there's more.
At least more to my enncore.
I'm thinking this through.
Don't roll your eyes at your zoo.

Okay, is the roll done?
Back to the fun.
The fun being if Hell is fake.
Whoops, he made a mistake.

He divorced an imaginary man.
Maybe he wasn't his biggest fan?
Those fake horns can be sharp.
He could have wanted to play the harp.

Or red wasn't his color anymore.
Wanted more white at his shore.
Found red such a drag,
So he waved the white flag.

Or maybe the white pen.
Dumped the devil from his den.
That imaginary mate took half his imaginary dough.
Where he went? Damned if I know.

The cat had to do that. Ever marry the devil where you are at? That would be rather bad. Did you get out of it at your pad? Hopefully you never had to sell your soul. Ever use or hear that saying as you are out for a stroll? I think I just gave the poor married to the devil humans gas. Oh where the mind goes of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, October 4, 2017

Carve It Out With Your Insecure Shout!


 It's that time of year.
The kiddies all cheer.
They may get diabetes too,
But that's nothing new.

And out they go.
A pumpkin to show.
They carve a face.
A happy or spooky embrace.

Have their own style.
Wide or scary smile.
The eyes are weird.
May even have a beard.

Things they have now,
Can sure wow.
Helping carvers all over.
Can even do one of rover.

But to each their own.
They have their own tone.
They carve out their way,
And then light their display.

Carving out the guts.
Blah to many OCD nuts.
They toss that aside,
Enjoying the ride.

Carve out time to do.
Maybe make pumpkin stew.
Can you even make that?
Sure beats this cat.

Carve out the pest.
So they do their best.
Can't stay full of goop.
Throws one for a loop.

Goop is now lost.
It has been tossed.
Carved out and thrown.
Happiness is now all alone.

No worries or care.
They may carve a spare.
They make their face,
Then off they race.

So be like the kiddos out there. Carve the crap out at your lair. Then toss it away and have a brighter day. That goop will be a load off of you and then you can create something new. There is nothing wrong with that. You can trust the cat. Just stay away from me with a pumpkin's goop mass. I don't need that touching the fur of my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Tuesday, October 3, 2017

Be Strong Like Donkey Kong!

Flex and trot around naked as can be. There you go at your sea. He does have a tie I suppose. And he has nothing down there for when the wind blows. Anyway, back on task as I have the strength to ask.

Strength is great.
Those muscles are top rate.
Can't deny that.
Unless steroid freak's at bat.

But that's not all.
Nope, more to it at your hall.
At least with idiots around,
Making many a sound.

Yell and scream,
Like a fan of some sports team.
Yell louder than the rest.
That will pass any strength test.

Be a bully to all.
Push them into a wall.
That will show your strength.
Shove anyone in arm's length.

Fast talk for the win.
Do all others in.
Come out on top.
Sure not a flop.

Follow what your told.
Don't upset the fold.
Stick with what is known.
Don't throw a dog a bone.

Don't comprise one bit.
Who needs that shit?
You are always right.
That is strength day or night.

Always fight.
Always look ready to bite.
Argue over stupid crap.
Be sure and be the winning chap.

Don't listen to any.
Opinions are many.
But ignore every single one.
Even if a new way should be done.

The key to it though,
For super strength to show,
Is just one little perk.
Come be an all around jerk.

Are you like that? Flex such strength where you are at? I hope not. The cat may make fun of you a lot. Probably not in a nice way too. Hey, I have the strength to warn you. Pffft to such people at their zoo. They can go fight with what I left in the loo. Do you have the strength to break logs like glass? Now that would impress my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, October 2, 2017

It Is Still Bad At Every Old Pad!

So I heard a nut once more give this an encore and the cat rolled his eyes. He sure wasn't going to win any prize. Stunk like smoke but he thought he was a clever few toothed bloke.

Movies cause violence.
Them we must silence.
They are so bad.
Wah wah wah at his pad.

Been there, done that.
Such logic is the equivalent of scat.
Desensitize they can do.
But other than that, some need a clue.

Let's go with it though.
Let's pretend it's a show.
Let's pretend it is true.
Let's see what we can do.

Cars cause drunk driving.
Damn, has to stink for those surviving.
How can they put a car in jail?
Maybe stick them on a boat and set sail?

Food causes you to be fat.
Well how about that?
Food is all to blame.
Food should feel the shame.

Bodies cause cancer.
From plumber to dancer.
No body and you won't get it.
That sure is some shit.

Cigarettes cause smoking.
So go and get toking.
Those cigarettes are there for the taking.
Look at them hippy hippy shaking.

Credit cards cause debt.
Yep, that's a safe bet.
They buy whatever they like.
Look at that brand new bike.

Computers cause crime.
I better drop a dime.
My computer is sooooo bad.
Shhhhh I don't want to make it mad.

Rhymes cause gas.
Better take a pass.
But get a tummy ache,
Or fall in a lake. 

What was that? Not agreeing with the cat? Damn, and I was about to sue my car. I heard its friend caused drunk driving some place afar. I can sue it because of that, right? Pfffft humans aren't so bright. Shifting the blame is all so many do. It's not what's in view, it's you. All comes back to you and what you do. But let's blame the magical gas that comes out my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, October 1, 2017

A Little Scoff Put Off!

The cat gets irked here and there and then rants away at his lair. Some nuts just very much annoy. That makes being whelmed hard to deploy. But that one must do or tell them off a time or two.

Appointment is made.
No need to trade.
It's ready to go.
Whoops, changed the flow.

Tomorrow it is.
We'll finish this biz.
Tomorrow I'll call.
I won't go to the mall.

Didn't you hear?
Tomorrow's not near.
It never comes.
Sorry about that, chums.

Tomorrow we'll meet.
We may even greet.
We'll get this done.
Away I won't run.

Oh, that was today?
Did today I say?
I know I said tomorrow.
Sorry if that brought sorrow.

Today you say?
That isn't at play.
It was tomorrow.
Days we can borrow.

I'll be on it.
Meet in a bit.
We'll get it done.
Look at that sun.

Oh, it's raining.
That sure is draining.
We'll meet when there's sun.
That is more fun.

Tomorrow is near.
Lend me an ear.
I'll let you know soon.
We'll meet some afternoon.

Aren't you ready yet?
Today was a safe bet.
But you missed it.
How dare you do that shit.

Pffffffffffffffft is all the cat can say to such idiots at play. Now I'm not talking dating, sometimes you must avoid the creepy that wants mating. I'm talking professional businesses and such. They can sure string you along very much. Then you tell them where to go and whoops, today is tomorrow. Funny how that works isn't it? Doesn't mean they still aren't a twit. Get any of those in the tomorrow class? They can bite my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, September 30, 2017

It Will So Ignore The Chill!

You know it is coming. I have a daily drumming. At least up until now. Hey, one day I may not post and wow. I have to croak sometime or maybe get a life that doesn't rhyme. The former will happen and so starts this rappin.

May and will.
Each a thrill.
Each a curse.
Not sure which is worse.

But one is right,
Here in sight.
The other wrong,
Yet many play along.

It will happen...
They keep yappin.
Like bippity boppity boo,
And poof, happens to you.

Yep, that is right.
Like a unicorn in sight.
It is oh so correct.
Should get no neglect.

It will happen...
Keep on a flappin.
I'll go and do,
And simply ignore you.

Taxes and death,
Your last breath.
That "will" happen.
The IRS will come a tappin.

But the rest.
Ha, you're a pest.
A positive pest,
But a pest at best.

You'll find a spouse.
You'll get a house.
You'll get a great job.
Your spouse won't be a slob.

You'll magically change.
Your life will arrange.
You'll even win big.
So come and dance a jig.

It will happen...
Keep that foot a tappin.
Just hear my continued yappin.
It's so true when I say it will happen.

Yeah, and I'll sprout wings and fly. I'll be a flying rhyming guy. Then I'll shoot flames from my eyes. A flaming, flying, rhyming guy in the skies. I'll also gain speed from super gas. A farting, flaming, flying, rhyming guy with sass. Hey, it will happen. Okay, I'll stop flappin. Do you use the it will happen pass? Pffft and what I just said will happen to my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, September 29, 2017

30 Miles With Plenty Of Piles!

The cat didn't even know these were still a thing until they wanted to go at that other wing. Then he got roped in. Or rather Pat did with an out and about spin. I stayed in bed and avoided that dread.

Don't be squirrely.
Get up early.
Skip your meal.
You have to get that deal.

The good won't last.
Be a thing of the past.
Early bird gets the whatever.
Worms are even more clever.

Whelmed you aren't able.
That is just a fable.
Push, shove and grab.
A deal you may nab.

You have to be quick.
That's the trick.
Get a deal by the ton.
Don't walk, run!

Get to the next table.
Push the others if able.
If not crawl to it.
You need to get that shit.

So hit the trail.
Get to each yard sale.
Even if they are on the street,
And the yard part is left in defeat.

Can't go slow.
There is 30 miles to go.
They are so long,
You'll sing a happy song.

Finding that deal.
Touch and feel.
Know it's just right.
Buy it just for spite.

Drive, stop and....crash.
Isn't it a bash?
Idiots pulling off each way.
A deal could be on display.

Pffft first and last time for that. Sure did not impress the cat. Nuts were about every which way and mostly crap was on display. But oh, let's get the deal. It's a deal that is real. 30 miles of them too. Whoops, after driving more like 1 or 2. Maybe even half a mile. Ever turn such a yard sale dial? If not you may want to stick with taking a pass. Trust my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, September 28, 2017

Don't Get Lost In The Cost!

Boy, that was cheap. Aren't you ready to take the leap? Am I getting ahead? This post hasn't been put to bed? Why would I put a post in bed? That needed to be said.

Look at this deal.
It is so for real.
You get all of this for that.
So cheap where you are at.

No, the fee is flat.
So don't be a dingbat.
Get it today,
Before it goes away.

$50 a month isn't bad.
You can afford that at your pad.
Just like the other stuff.
You can never get enough.

We've got you trained.
Whoops, income got drained.
Now it may be tough.
But don't you love your stuff?

Oh, it broke.
Sorry about that bloke.
Your warranty doesn't cover it.
In other words, tough shit.

But you can throw it away.
Although you still have to pay.
Can't get out of that.
Who cares if you can't feed the cat.

You could fix it too.
Only $5000 to do.
That is just so cheap.
Come now, take the leap.

That's only $99.99 every other week.
You can give it a peek.
Beats throwing it away.
Either way, you'll still pay.

There you are.
Fixed that car.
Or what was it?
I can't remember that bit.

But it was cheap,
And you took the leap.
Oh, it broke once more?
That's only $4386.54 to fix at your shore.

Things are so cheap, right? Until the budget gets tight. Or you make the budget tight by letting such things take flight. Then comes the added cost and soon everything is lost. Or at least the bank account has a far less amount. But oh it was sooooooo cheap. Ever take such a leap? I'll stick to the singing bass. If he breaks, I'll just chew on him with my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Wednesday, September 27, 2017

The Power Of Brand Across The Land!

You humans sure stick to this and that like your shoe would to dog scat. That is hard to get off by the way. Or at least that's what I heard Pat say. Beats bare feet though. Okay, away we go.

Stick to this.
Stick to that.
Can't go amiss.
You might go splat.

But there's the might.
There's the not.
Might ain't right.
There's the plot.

Might could be wrong.
Might could be right.
But just play along,
Same day, same night.

Complain anyway.
That you like.
Have your say,
But walk, don't hike.

Want the new.
But watch the old.
How dare you,
Let new take hold.

That's your brand.
Just like it's "your" team
We've unspun that strand,
So I'll let you dream.

You can't cheat.
Yeah, like a brand would know.
Need that same treat.
Even if it is so so.

Other could be worse.
Other could be better.
Can't risk a curse.
I may need to write a letter.

Email may be the way.
But that's for another day.
I'll still get my say.
My brand is here to stay.

Reboot the brand.
It's still alive.
Redos are at hand.
Or would that be sequel #5?

How can other brands ever becomes brands if people stick to the same old stands? And then people are given the same brands with movies and such, whining more than a touch, but they go for a view. Yep, that is really going to get something new. Each movie, book, product, etc. was new at some point. Are you stuck on brand power at your joint? The cat has no need to follow the mass so you'll never brand my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall. 

Tuesday, September 26, 2017

Way To Be At Your Certain Sea!

Did you know you humans are certain of things? Yeah, we went down that road in my past blog wings. So that you know. But did you know there was another certain blow?

Certain is the way.
The way of the day.
The way of life.
Not for husband or wife.

Nope, for the kid.
Certain isn't hid.
Everything comes to be.
Certain it is for each kiddie.

Certain at five,
School is your hive.
Depending on birthday date,
But still a certain fate.

Certain at six,
There are no tricks.
Next grade will come due.
Don't even need a clue.

Certain if marks are high,
Through the grades you'll fly.
Sometimes even if they're not.
Get pushed through with the lot.

Certain you'll graduate.
Through it you'll skate.
There is no caper.
Walk up and grab the paper.

Certain you'll go somewhere.
Certain you'll have education to spare.
Certain of the cost.
That certainly isn't lost.

Certain you'll take each class.
Certain you'll pass.
With high marks you did.
Certain wins the bid.

Certain is a way of life.
Built in with no strife.
Certain you'll get a job when you're done.
Applying.......Whoops, so ends your certain fun.

The programming is through.
Nothing is certain for you.
Except taxes and death.
Certainly you may need to take a breath.

Ever think about that? Popped in for the cat. Kids are so certain and it is programmed into them after a few decades or so. Then whoops, the real world strikes a blow. Certain gets chucked away and uncertainty comes into play. To such a wake up call we give sass. Certain, for some things, is liked way more by my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Monday, September 25, 2017

Get Ready To Throw And Ho Ho Ho!

We need to get it done. This post must be spun. It just has to be. Bah, that I can see. I don't want to think about it. Nope, not one bit. So I'll fix that. I'll follow a human stat.

Today I can't post.
Nope, not at my coast.
I just can't work.
That is so not a perk.

The keyboard is screwed.
It is being rude.
Or maybe it's me.
I'm not telling thee.

Here you go.
I rhyme from a foe.
I paid them off.
Come now, don't scoff.

I can rhyme.
I keep time
I can rhyme.
I keep time.

Wow, that was a perk.
Hmm, maybe needs work.
I'll throw more money at it.
We can't have it be shit.

I can rhyme more.
I get an encore.
I can rhyme more.
I get an encore.

That was sad.
It's borderline bad.
Maybe a bit more dough.
I don't know though.

I can rhyme more more.
I get an encore encore.
I can rhyme more more.
I get an encore encore.

That gave me a rash.
I need to find more cash.
Here, have some more.
I know you can soar.

I can rhyme more more more.
I get an encore encore encore.
I can rhyme more more more.
I get an encore encore encore.

I somehow don't think it got fixed. I guess that idea is nixed. You humans have such dumb ideas at your sea. Good thing I have no money anyway to go on a spree. Do you just throw money at it and hope it gets fixed? That idea may need to be deep sixed. Sometimes it crumbles like glass. That would hurt if it stuck in my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Sunday, September 24, 2017

A Remembering Plot Or Not!

The cat looks here and there and all registers at our lair, but do we remember all at every moment of every day? Pffft we aren't an elephant at our bay. Some days in they won't click. Others they shall some slick.

A remembering time.
Easy as can be.
It is a crime,
If not done by thee.

A crime just because.
Because you never thought.
Oh look, some fuzz.
I've forgotten that plot.

You were on the go.
Making sure life stayed sane.
But oh know,
Forgot one thing in your brain.

That is so bad.
So bad of you.
I'm now mad.
So mad I'll moo.

It's the end of times.
Cats and dogs as one.
Everyone loves mimes.
There will be no more fun.

It was only one time.
One time it slipped your mind.
But that is a crime.
Who cares about the grind.

I remembered it.
So should you.
You have the wit.
But you haven't a clue.

I never said a word.
I still remembered though.
You are just a lazy turd.
Tonight you'll eat crow.

Literally eat it.
That's all for you.
Hear my fit.
Every word is true.

It is all up to me.
I remembered every bit.
That plant you can clearly see,
You forgot to water it.

Ever get someone nag at you like that? When with all their whining they could have done the task in no time flat? I've seen it a time or two. Many get upset about the stupidest things coming due. It's especially dumb when someone has a ton of things on the go. They can't remember every little thing every minute of every day at their show. Yet upset one surely turns to instead of just turning to do. Do it and it's done, no need for poor you to be spun. Do you hold a grudge against such a lad or lass? Pffft is all that can be said by my once in a blue moon forget to remember little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Saturday, September 23, 2017

Time To Appease The Many Fleas!

The movies can't be good. Nope, can't just make them like that at any hood. That is just uncalled for. They may then actually be worth an encore. We have to stick to the script. The one that you don't see flipped.

Here you go.
Tied in a bow.
Before you start,
Fill the cart.

Your idea is great.
But all can't relate.
You need more.
So open the door.

Time to appease.
Appease the fleas.
You need them all.
Follow the ball.

Damn if it's good.
Who cares if it's understood.
That isn't our goal.
Have to appease the whole.

A character must be gay.
That is just the way.
You must add them in.
It's a must for a win.

A character must be Latino, Asian and Black.
We don't want any flack.
Plus we have to appeal to the Chinese market.
Want them to fill the seats and park it.

Wait, it's an all color cast?
That won't last.
Throw a white guy in.
Force it so we win.

A character must have muscles.
Can even be from Brussels.
Don't forget the shirt off scenes.
Can be with or without jeans.

A character must have big breasts and be skinny.
She can have a stupid name like Babs or Winnie.
She doesn't even need to talk.
We just want people to come and gawk.

What was that?
This movie feels flat?
Who cares, it has it all.
That is all we need so follow the bouncing ball.

You can so tell when they force such things. Nothing but puppeteers pulling strings. If it is part of the story, great, add it in. Otherwise pfffft is all I can say at my bin. Do you force characters or such in just to appease? The cat can give some extra audience of fleas. I'm sure they are around here somewhere in mass. There may even be one waiting to view on my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Friday, September 22, 2017

Without A Flaw In the Claw!

Let's lay down the law. There can't be a flaw. Nope, not a single one. That would just make many run. Flaws are soooo bad. Can't have them at any pad. Nope, not one bit. They aren't a hit.

Everything is great.
Everything is grand.
I've got the perfect mate.
The perfect ring on my hand.

Everything is swell.
Everything is good.
I never misspell.
I'm always understood.

Everything is neat.
Everything is rad.
I've nothing to delete.
I've done nothing bad.

Everything is super.
Everything is nice.
I haven't a blooper.
I need no advice.

Everything is here.
Everything is there.
I've got a perfect ear.
I've got perfect hair.

Everything is ready.
Everything is done.
I remain steady,
No matter what's spun.

Everything is wise.
Everything is right.
I always win first prize.
I'm a perfect sight.

Everything is high.
Everything is tops.
I don't ever have to try,
Nothing ever flops.

Everything is true.
Everything is firm.
I am so above you.
I've aced every term.

Everything is great.
Everything is grand.
You cannot relate.
Such perfection can't be planned.

Not even the cat is that stuck up. I'd rather deal with a pup. Know any humans like that? They scare the cat. If you don't think you have a flaw in anything at all. You may need a smack to the head as a wake up call. Flaws are more fun anyway. Perfection is pretty much nonexistent in everything on display. But some still like to believe it within their perfect class. No flawless record or flawless anything else for my little rhyming ass.

Later all, have a nice fall.

Thursday, September 21, 2017

The Can't Afford Chokes On A Cord!

What was that? You can't afford it where you are at? Yeah, that million dollar house is probably out of reach. I don't think you'll be flying off to space to teach. But what was that? You can't afford "that" is still your chat?

Can't afford a 2 dollar ticket.
I think I'll picket.
That I can't do.
Nope, can't afford one or two.

Can't afford a 50 cent bar.
Not good at ones and bar.
But doesn't matter to me.
Can't afford it you see.

Can't afford a shoe lace.
Nope, I just can't embrace.
I have to walk in bare feet,
As I go down the street.

Can't afford a bucket.
Yeah, $3 I say fluck it.
That is far too much money.
No, I'm not being funny.

Can't afford a toe nail clipper.
Hey, at least they look chipper.
My zombie feet are in.
Don't you think them a win?

I can afford a cruise.
And with it much booze.
That is so great.
I got to be first mate.

I can afford a $100 cell phone bill.
That is such a thrill.
I can be connected everywhere.
Unless in a deep, dark bear lair.

I can afford a $10 coffee with ease.
I buy them whenever I please.
They are just soooo good.
I won't share in my hood.

I can afford designer clothes.
I can even get a new nose.
Don't I look good striking a pose?
Look at my manicured toes.

I can afford the latest trend.
Not having it may offend.
I need to get it first.
That old one may burst.

A bit of a conundrum there. Pfffft to such humans at their lair. Are you one that cries poverty at your sea when it is clearly the fault of thee? Hopefully not. The cat would make fun a lot. There are a ton of those though. Oh no, a 10 dollar haircut I can't afford at my show. But oh yes, a $5000 designer bag I can afford because it has class. Pfffft again to such humans says my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Wednesday, September 20, 2017

Time For Play All One Way!

The cat plays two way here and there. Mostly with Cassie at our lair. But I eat the dog for fun. That is more one way as I bite his bun. Seems to be one way a lot though. But still fun for me, don't you know.


This is my play.
They didn't see it that way.
I guard the hallway.
No one getting through is play.


Oh, I see more.
I give a roar.
They give me a few glares.
Then they go back downstairs.
 

I'm still playing one way
I'm having my say.
Thinking how I will play with your toes,
While I strike a pose.


 Cassie wants in.
She'll take one way for a spin.
A little whack near,
And howling I could hear.


She did not care.
 In one way play all is fair.
Even standing on his house.
Or treating him like a mouse.


 Staring at him works too.
Look at his angry view.
Isn't that fun to see?
One way play amuses me.


Get even closer still.
That is sure a thrill.
He's got nowhere to run. 
Stuck with her fun.


 Did you wail?
Oh look, my tail.
I bet I can get that in.
Time to go for the win.


 See? Shadow's on the wall.
That means she won it all.
She is standing tall.
The other guy isn't having a ball.


Grumpy he is still.
Cassie got a thrill.
 Now time to stretch.
One way play sure beats fetch.

Do you do one way play? What? It's fun for the one way player at any bay. The grumpy guy didn't want to join in for a playing fit. I guess he's too old for that shit. Cassie was more annoying to him than me. I better up my game at our sea. I can't be out shined by Cass. I will have to be a more one way playing little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Tuesday, September 19, 2017

It's Official Now So Doesn't It Wow?

You can count on me to bring you everything at my sea. Who needs products that are great? These ones have been proven to be top rate. That is all you need to know. I'll even tell you so.

Pee Water, The Official Water of Dogs.
Nope, not those lazy hogs.
You can be sure it is great,
Because mutts take the bait.

Flip Flops, The Official Shoe of Texas Rangers.
Damn, they'll sure stop dangers.
It's official so buy, buy, buy.
Off the shelves they will fly.

Moose Print Bed Sheets.
The Official Sheets of The Streets.
Millions of streets vouch for these.
Buying them should be a breeze.

Piss Warm Beer.
The Official Beer Of Doctors Who Study The Ear.
We were too lazy to look up the correct name.
But 100% we back our claim.

Walkie Talkies, The Official Communication Means of The NSA.
Now doesn't that just make your day?
You'll have to get them next time you're out.
Antique stores may be about.

Trees With Branches.
The Official Trees of Cow Ranches.
So that is how they grow.
It is always good to know.

Butt Cracks and Shopping Carts.
The Official Product of All Wal-Marts.
Hmm, that one wasn't very new.
I think everyone has seen that view.

Alarm Clocks, The Official Clocks of Bosses.
My, they sure don't want to suffer losses.
Bosses everywhere want them sold.
Alarm clocks are pure gold.

Chewed Gum Under A Seat.
The Official Gum For An Early Childhood Treat.
And best of all it is free.
Hmm, I think we'll go back to the tree.

A Filled Up Litter Box.
The Official Box of The Makers of Socks.
Because then they'll get you to buy more.
Hey, can't help if we miss at our shore.

I have so many more to share. You can email me and I'll send you thousands at your lair. These Official products really help you to buy. Who cares if they aren't used by the Official girl, team, or guy. They have The Official in the name. So that is all you need to light your flame. Pfffft and I'm really a singing bass. So says The Official little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Monday, September 18, 2017

Upped Our Game All The Same!

The cat's goal was done with last years run. But I guess I'm just as mouthy as can be and you just can't stop me. At least not yet. You humans provide plenty of material to this pet.

I've missed this.
I've missed that.
Given plenty a hiss,
Chewed plenty of fat.

I've skipped a chore,
I've skipped a day.
I went out to explore,
Damn the 9-5 bay.

I've skipped a day of writing,
At least here and there.
Hey, had to do some fighting,
With the cats at the other lair.

I've missed a movie.
I've missed a show.
It may have been groovy,
Later I gave it a go.

I've skipped eating.
I've skipped shopping.
Something needed completing,
Or maybe some cropping.

I've skipped a meeting.
I've skipped a class.
Both were so fleeting,
And boring to my rhyming ass.

I've skipped a trip,
I've skipped a move.
Don't give me lip,
Of moving crap I don't approve.

I've missed a deal.
I've missed a job.
At least I'm no seal,
Or some kind of slob.

I've missed a sign.
I've missed a bird.
Lost never did align,
And death to the flying rat wasn't the word.

I've missed a...post?
Whoops, nope not yet.
At least for 6 years at my coast.
Damn, I'm one mouthy pet.

Today makes 6 years that I have not missed a day. I have before way way way back at my bay. But the cat was finding his groove back then. Spelling was scary too back then at my den. Have you ever posted every day at your bay? I know a few who do, at least when the a to z comes into view. I guess we'll see how long I can pass daily verbal gas, as the goal was already met last year of my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Sunday, September 17, 2017

A Single Look, Hook Or By Crook!

Don't look anywhere else today. Stare at what I say. You are going to repeat it everywhere. Are you ready to stare? You can't talk about anything else to anyone. Remember, that's not part of the fun.

This just in,
Famous Bloke no one cares about got a new chin.
Now they care.
Now you stare.

Now you know.
Tell it to friend and foe.
Don't skip a beat.
Tell it to all on the street.

This just in,
Famous Bloke we care about got a new chin.
We heard it already.
But it still comes steady.

You still must tell.
Such news does sell.
Tell and tell everyone.
Write stories on it by the ton.

This just in.
Famous Bloke receives new chin.
You may have heard it before.
But it deserves an encore.

Isn't it great?
Such a fine trait.
Don't forget to tell.
Spreading news is swell.

This just in.
Famous Bloke bought new chin.
That is wowing.
Sure beats new eye browing.

That's not a word.
But don't be absurd.
Talk about the chin.
Not to is a sin.

This just in.
Famous Bloke improved his chin.
That is so neat.
Doesn't it look sweet?

Even the cabbie knows.
Your focus sure shows.
World War 3 is at hand.
What was that? Oh yes, his chin is grand.

Wow, you humans focus on one thing 1000 times over. You have a worse attention span than rover. 500 channels and 1,000,000 sites and they all say the same thing. With a new chinned bloke do you want to have a fling? What does it matter anyway? Wowweeee that is something to talk about at any bay. I just passed some stinky gas. Feel free to spread the word about my gassy little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Saturday, September 16, 2017

A Not In The Know High Or Low!

The cat has seen it a time or ten. By now what haven't I seen at my den? I'm sure there is probably quite a bit. I have yet to see real alien spit. But who'd want to see that? Hey, could have healing properties you can market where you are at. I better stop. This could make too much writing up top.

Keep on a going.
The same old showing.
It may be bad.
You may get mad.

No fun is had.
Back to bad.
Worse and worse.
You just curse.

Keep on a going.
Whoops, did that flowing.
But it keeps growing.
That showing of knowing.

Knowing nowhere is there.
Nowhere to spare.
Nowhere is somewhere.
But pulls out your hair.

Bald and mad.
Lex Luthor is had.
At least you got dough,
If that were so.

On we go.
That you know.
Because we're you.
Confusing at my zoo.

That we know.
So eat crow.
They are tasty.
Enough time umm wasty.

The end is near.
Still bad I fear.
So let's keep on going,
With this showing.

Sinking deeper into a pit.
How about that shit?
Let's keep on going.
We'll get our showing.

Our relationship will magically work.
You magically won't be a jerk.
I'll magically get a promotion.
Can't board the quitting motion.

Pfffft is all the cat has to say. Quitting is fine in many a way. Shifting gears it will allow you and new can come due. Or at least a change of scene. Why beat a dead horse, besides it being mean? Just because something didn't reach the finish line doesn't mean you didn't learn. New ideas and things you can earn. So sometimes quitting must come to pass. On that you can trust my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.

Friday, September 15, 2017

Need A Mate For A Halloween Date?

The cat figured he would help you out early so by then you don't get squirrely. I mean it is only a month and a half away. You may need time to sort through this oh so great display.

n9t veey sociable keep to myself alot
And redundant too with the your plot.
replys only if interested to kno more hmu
Run on sentences still come with acronyms due.

no idea what you are looking for no idea on my time
Damn, are you a new kind of repeating mime?
Looking for some who has their head on their shoulders
Contrary to some beliefs, it doesn't roll anywhere else like boulders.

I love a man with a nice peard
So staring at you isn't weird?
Love anything ufos and I want to be abducted
Any man may find that a little obstructed.

If I could rescue all the animals at the SPCA... I totally would
The cat crosses you off immediately at our hood.
Painting boardgames are some of my favorite things
So you paint two at a time in the wings? 

None smoker ,drinker & none drug user 
But are you a Non abuser?
very organized put together
Too bad your sentences I can't weather. 

to ne me of not to be me
Is that a question from thee?
live for cuddles with my dog
Even when it leaves you a brown log? 

So, here I am. And there you are, somewheres out there
That is very astute of you at your lair. 
enjoy company no where it takes us
Going nowhere may cause a fuss

Going out and also easy
Now to some that may be pleasy.
mild mannered and fun
Someone may sue for that one

No drama and stress
So one or the other no more or less?
founditinthe ditch
Ain't that a bitch.

picture...period...plus...
Lying as you board the whiny...bus.
Permanent is my goal
Will you stuff me like a pet troll?

And there you are. Now you can get a date at your sand bar. You may have to travel far but aren't they worth it to hop in your car? Don't you want one all for you? Heck, it's for Halloween, try for two. Double the crazy mass. I would skedaddle the hell out of there with my little rhyming ass.

Fill your rummer, get drunk all summer.